Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
