Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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