I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I'd cum for enchiladas.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
