Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
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You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize