I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
