yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
