Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
