They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
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