Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
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