singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
