Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
