yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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