I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
