If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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