You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
