Walk of Shame. In a state park.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
