Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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