the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
it hurts more in the daytime
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
