nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
