Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
