this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
