dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
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