used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
