I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
