I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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