I seem to have left my pride at pride
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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