forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
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