I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize