I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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