Walk of Shame. In a state park.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
