is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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