dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
