I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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