my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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