Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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