This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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