We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize