I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
