im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
