What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
