I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
