4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
