Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that