I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!