What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize