Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
