you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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