Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
