thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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