What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
