dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
