There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
